I love deer skulls.

How to begin.... New Year's Eve. For New Year's my family and I went to my Grandparents for a late Christmas. Don't ask why. It's a long story. Anyway, for those of you who don't know, they live in Chatham, Va, which is very remote and just about the tiniest town that you will come across. The post office is about the size of a jail cell. No Kidding. I judge towns by the size of their post office(s).

Ok, that was kidding. I really don't do that...

Anyway, we had a great time. We ate food, played 3 games of boggle, ate more food... We started to watch Spiderman1 at like 10:00...which by the way is a bad idea because we didn't finish until about 12:30. I finally slept at like 1 o'clock in the morning which is scandalous.

Bunny Trails. I love bunny trails. Have I ever told you that I love bunny trails? I do. Bunny trails are like....big puffy marshmallows falling from the sky...

Never mind.

New Year's Day dawned bright and cheery in the cold and somewhat windy land of Chatham. Eventually my family got up and at 1:30 in the afternoon my cousin Kayleigh and I went exploring to the old Mill.

Explanation: The 'Old Mill' is a big stone structure that has been on the banks of a creek for over 100 years. About 70 years ago it burned down, but the stone parts and the really big and REALLY rusty wheel still there. Needless to say, it's cool, and the only time that you can actually get to it is in January or February and even then it's quite a job not to get thorns in your shoes(which, by the way, I got several) and not to tear a hold in your clothes. Around the Mill are a bunch of staircases that lead to nothing, and walls around big pits that go to about 9 feet deep. Real fun.

Anyway, My cousin and I decided to take what I call the 'Scenic Route.' There are two ways to get to the Mill. You can be a citified chicken ( no offense intended) and take the logical path (the nice, paved road that goes right past the Mill) or you can choose to be Brave, Bold and Adventurous (in other words... a farmer) and take the 'Scenic Route'. My cousin, unfortunately, leans toward the former, whilst I am the latter. Naturally, since I knew both ways, we went my way.

The 'Scenic route' is a lovely, peaceful and tranquil walk through the woods, past a creepy cabin, through a meadow until you have reached the Mill. If you're lucky and don't get lost, that is. Anyway, we were having a lovely time. The sun was shining and the birds were building their nests.

Or they would have been had it not been very cold, windy, and January.

We were progressing wonderfully. We only tripped about 5 times each; She tore her jeans and I landed in a mud pile. Figures.

Actually, it really was a nice walk. We didn't trip and I did not land in a mud pile. Like I said, it's a pretty journey through the forest. Since we don't see each other often we took advantage of the time together and talked. And talked. And talked some more.

I was having a good old time, walking and talking like a typical girl. Then about halfway through the woods I realized that I was standing on something rather hard.

A half-eaten deer carcass. My Gosh. Doesn't that just lift your spirits and send them soaring? Mine sure did. Soared right up that golden staircase all the way to heaven.

Boy, that skeleton sure did add to the scenery. I don't know what it was.... maybe it was that deer's bohunkus that was still intact. Maybe it was the empty eye holes that stared into nothingness. Maybe it was the fact that I was standing on the neck. I don't know what it was, but something about that dead deer made my forest experience the best thing that ever happened to me.

That deer was so pretty. If I had had gloves and a garbage bag, you know what I would have done? I would have removed the entire thing, bohunkus and all, reassembled it, and hung it from the ceiling in my bedroom, right above my bed.

And that is the end of Part 1 of 'The deer story'. The rest you will have to come up with yourself.

Seriously, though... all of that is the gospel truth.

Why do these things always happen to me?

Did I mention that I love Bunny Trails?